'Twas 12 Days Before Theft Season
‘Twas 12 days before Theft Season, when all through the smart house,
Not a device was active, not even an IoT mouse.
The device that you bought from a random seller online,
That shipped from far-far away, had arrived in due time.
It was the gift that she begged for, pleaded and wined,
The one that she pined for, for six months’ time.
Not finding the original, this knock-off will do,S
he must be happy, she is my princess; what would you do?
Being the perfect Dad, and wanting things right,
You plugged it in and charged it forthright.
Manuals read, it was ready to go,
But little did you know, this was only the beginning of the show.
As visions of your princess’ happiness lead you to a sound slumber,
The process was the first day of 12 days of havoc, 12 days of plunder.
The fiendish, deceitful, treacherous crew,
Of malicious actors, cleverly deceived you.
Their motives were simple and really quite grand,
They wanted your cash, and constructed a well thought out plan.
They embedded some malware in your princess’ toy,
It was only so they could spread their own twisted Grinch joy.
By now you’re angry, mislead, and peeved,
Try to understand their perspective, it was just business indeed.
This was not personal or a coordinated attack,
You simply fell into an elaborate trap.
Which simply began as the product of many things,
A series of cataclysmic, nefarious, IT security categorical Beings.
Unless your memory is foggy or faded from too much nog,
You will recall this year had been plagued by more than a few evil phenomena.
There has been ransomware, phishing, and malware, oh boy;
That stole data, DDOS’d and controlled the IoT devices, often so needlessly employed.
The threat actors conspired plans throughout the year,
To fool people into their plans during the holiday cheer.
Now the actors concocting this dastardly deed, a day stretch for each is all they need,
For the 12 days of plundering to proceed.The malware from the toy began to spread,
There wasn’t much more for you to do, except lay in your bed,
While visions of smart devices danced in your head.The deviants smiled, cheered, and were consumed with glee,
With you sound asleep, the nefarious plot of a diabolical plan began to succeed.
On the second day of theft season, their plans initiated with,
A phishing email you received, that wasn’t a myth,
Of you being a prince, from some made up place,
Or a bank sending you, new forms for an unresolved fictitious case.
Knowing your desire and quests for the greatest of deals,
They baited you to buy their product, a smart router, to provoke and entice your smart home appeal.
At $14.99 with free shipping, you cheer,You thought you found the deal of the year.
The new smart router you coveted so much,
Was dastardly fiendish and rotten just to touch.
On the third day of theft season, it patiently sat and watched,
And looked were it should touch, for the most damage to launch.
On day four of theft season, it could have waited hours or days,
There really was no rush, to start the havoc it craved.
It found the thermostat in that smart house you love so much,
And that’s when it started to get a big rush.
On the fifth day it moved from your thermostat, toaster and refrigerator door,
To the alarm panel, tablets, printers, TVs, and more.
Finally your phones on the sixth day, and then things really began to soar.
It recruited for its army and learning your unknowns.
Consuming contacts, pictures, cloud access, and anything else shown.
On the seventh day it left malware and other malevolent goodies for you to share,
And infected everyone that you love and care.
On day eight it searched through your contacts, texts, photos, and apps,
It knew who you loved, trusted, spoke with most and the places you traveled based on your maps.
It also knew what you held dearly,
And could see when it was needed very clearly.
Unfortunately, it also knew of that present, your baby girl, coveted most.
Could this be a new target, another gadget to spread mischief and more data to consume? Another conquest to boast?
Looking through your contacts and messages it knew how to deceive.
It had the premise for the phishing attack it would ultimately conceive.
A truly spectacular, devious deed,All from one simple present under the tree.
On day nine, the photos and contacts were quite truly astonishing,
It found some pictures and a text you’d wish it not see,
A message from someone named Ashley, and a Finder thingy
You’ll probably want to start looking for a divorce attorney.
Add it to the list of the ill- gotten intel feed,
On day ten it found cables and memos, it did not expect to see,
A deliciously luscious perplexity,
Tidbits and goodies from a three-letter agency.
The bot will keep these under automated lock and key.
This will provide great leverage for additional entry,
Extortion equals money, if you want your data to be free,
That is their present to you under the Christmas tree.
On day eleven, in an attempt to spread more holiday glee,
They knew you'd be attending the office holiday party.
Via your phone, NFC sensed numerous devices within proximity.
Oh look Timmy has no password, and Johnny has been very naughty.
Day twelve is the last of the deviously, deceptive, thievery spree.
Another aspect that they did not discuss, but is of great importance for free.
Pestilence and anonymity, is a precious necessity.
Being able to come and go as they please, and remain undetected, in the event, they need to flee.
They patched your firmware, modified your logs,
Created tunnels to one place near and one place far, all while drinking copious amounts of spiked egg nog
All to ensure no pesky good guys would knock-knock on their doors, enjoy the tedious search from afar.
Now they can finally relax, because no one knows who or where they truly are.
A simple IoT mouse, or other device,
Was probably something you would not even think twice.
It should evoke fear, because a DDoS army of millions is enough to cripple, most any website,
Or even a security site in the night.
It sits idle, and patiently waits, for the next update, the next victim, the next plan,
Because hiding plainly in a child’s toy is really quite grand.
That ladies and gentleman is the 12-day plan.